Handling Consent Violation Reports

I can’t say this loudly enough…
It is not easy to deal with consent violation reports.  Doesn’t matter if you are hearing it as a friend/family or as the host of an event, it can be very challenging to figure out what to say, what to do.

If you host events or head a group and the person disclosing is reporting to you because of that perceived authority you have, the challenges go well beyond the immediacy of the person in front of you, and often include having to deal with fall-out (no matter what, if anything, you do with the report).

I have spent the last two years, along with FHB and ASPECC, working alongside of many wonderful organizations and individuals to develop policies and procedures regarding violation reports.   We met with EPS, Victim Services, Compass Sexual Health and Wellness, Trauma Informed Therapists, SACE, Alberta Health and even with the Minister of Justice.

I spent the last two days in a very intense workshop put on by the Alberta Association of Sexual Assault Services (presented by SACE) “First Responder Training” that addresses many of these challenges and concerns.  I will be spending a good portion of the next two weeks incorporating the information we have gathered (2 years worth of meetings, sources, research and networking) into a presentation and led discussion on this very sensitive topic.

This presentation is FREE, and is intended for persons who make and/or will be expected to enforce/follow policies regarding consent violation disclosures.

It won’t be an easy workshop to attend, nor to teach.  The subject matter is complex, challenging, and at times triggering emotional responses. I am someone who has experienced sexual abuse in my lifetime, both as a child and as an adult, both in mainstream and in BDSM contexts, but I am willing to cope with the impact of the workshop content in order to share what we have learned.  It is my hope you are willing to take that information and use it however you feel works for you.

The workshop will introduce some frameworks, and allow for interactive discussions about various scenarios and decision making tools for policy makers.  You will have opportunity to practice the skills shared, to ask questions, and share your own skills and resources as well.

The only rule is that all attending must agree that we will all be respectful.  That means no name calling or other personal attacks.  It is absolutely fine to disagree with another person (including with me and the other workshop facilitators), but disagreements will be framed with civility and respect for all attending.

I do hope to see you there, regardless of the role you have in the community.  Seating is limited to 40 people and persons who host events, lead groups, facilitate workshops or manage spaces where sex positive and/or kink events occur, will be prioritized.

Content is not BDSM specific.
If you have questions or concerns please feel free to let me know on here, or via aropedeevil@gmail.com

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