Queerness in 2025
Being queer today is fraught with political awareness; so much is happening both locally and internationally to remind us of how tentative our rights are and that hate is still part of our culture. As a clinical counsellor I am seeing this reflected, time and time again, in my clients-they are often struggling to cope with the growing unease they carry; they are disclosing a decrease in perceived self-empowerment and an increase in anxiety, depression and more.
For those of us who are struggling with the changing political landscape, we are intensely aware of our position. Here in Canada we have significant protections to our rights that we enjoy on the daily. At the same time we are being made attentive to how tenous this is. Alberta, for example, is loudly leading the way to highlight hateful rhetoric about queerness as something to be legislated against, protected against and othered. Two days ago Danielle Sm1th decided to again enact the notwithsdanding clause against transgender people READ MORE HERE. Smith is making it very creepy; with her bill to ban transgirls from sports (I am curious, are transgender guys still allowed to be in sports?) requiring a signed letter from parents asserting that their child is cisgender female; her attempts to limit children’s access to ”gender affirming care”, and he legislation about pronouns in schools. For some added excitement, her minister of education has advised school boards that they are not permitted to have books that include non-explicit sexual references for any student pre grade 10, and no explicit materials at all.. In a very public display of malicious compliance, a huge list of books that would need to be banned under that criteria was released in Edmonton. Human rights organizations are fighting all of this; but while we wait to see how that works out we are giving a long side-eye to our neighbours to the south.
The USA is so unsafe right now for queer folks, particularly transgender and nonbinary folks, that a judge in July made a clear statement to that effect READ MORE HERE
We are watching queer rights be revoked in the US; quickly, with little to no resistance.
No wonder we are reporting higher than ever rates of depresesion, substance use, anxiety disorders, identity crisis and more….
So what can we do?
Staying healthy during times of intense pressure can be challenging. There are many things we can attempt to bolster our well-being and foster some resilience in times like now.
CONNECTION:
Foster connection with others. Join groups, find other folks with your brand of queerness, join the pride centre, paritcipate in pride events. These connections are a huge part of resilience building; allowing us to connect to the human experience and reduce our sense of isolation; to expand our brainstorming over how to thrive and survive can support us deeply. Online, you have access to a larger community, and in person, you can activate those mirror neurons to your advantage! Reach out, get involved, get connected! (email angel@aspecc.ca to join teh discord).
Self Care
I am not talking bubble baths and yoga (although those are both lovely). I am challenging you to go deeper and start meeting your own needs. Self-care is knowing your boundaries, communicating through conflict, and looking at your whole wellness wheel and bolstering the areas that are not thriving (sleep, medical, spiritual, family bonds, learning, occupational, rest and recreation, nutrition, pleasure, nature connection).
Stress Busting Activities
When anxiety is high remember that you can use TIPP (Temperature (cold water on wrists or face), Intense exercise (short burst of intense body movement), Paced breathing, PAired muscle relaxation) to bring it down a bit, use the rule of 3 (3 things you see, 3 things you hear, 3 things your body feels from the outside) to bring it down more. After that there is journaling, communicating your experience to others, therapy, using your emotional regulation skills…. they all help you to cope!!
Joy = Resistance
Every moment of joy you connect to is a big FU to the anti-queer movement. Every smile, every laugh, every…single…moment…. of expericing even the teeniest bit of joy. YES we are worried and want to keep writing our letters, voting carefully, and speaking up when it is safe to do so-AND we also need to LIVE. Spend time with people you like. Go fishing. Hike a waterful path. Learn somethgin new. Watch a sunrise. Plant a garden. Move your body. And let joy fill you. Being miserable will not solve a damn thing.
When it is an Emergency
Reach out for help. Do not suffer in isolation. If that means calling for medical support, do it. If that means reaching out to a friend to spend time together, then go for it.
In solidarity and love
Angel